Employees are of Diverse Species….

Do you know someone in your workplace, who keeps ranting about the amount of work he / she has to do? Do you then see the same person gossiping about the dress a fellow colleague is wearing, or showing off his ‘Know-It-All’ degree from the University of Dumb and repeats the same thing the next day?

Then, if you slowly turn your head around, you will also find in the corner, a person working her ass off, creating everything her team is built on, finishing the projects and quietly making the way out at the end of the day.

I have had the pleasure (or, not) of meeting, working and observing some great (or not, again!) employees. Some have been a complete pain in the ass, some a delight to work with, and some others are just space-occupiers.

….Just like the different Automobiles you find on Road….

Some days back, I saw a three-wheeler cut through the speeding cars, almost killing the two-wheeler that was oblivious to his intentions. After bringing his mother and sister into the picture (in a not so good way!), people resumed their journeys.

…..And that’s where it struck me….

.. Employees are like these Automobiles you find on any road!

Here are 8 Types of Employee Categories you will often find at your workplace:

1. The Buses:

These are tough, resilient and with years of experience that has laid the foundation of the workplace. Who was once considered as strong, inspiring and project-runners, has now been sidelined with negligible credit. Buses can work in any condition and no amount of external honking seem to bother them. They continue to work with the same grit and determination even today, only with lesser enthusiasm.

PAY SCALE: Low to Medium

2. The Premium Sports Cars:

These are the ones I was talking about before! They look great, so having them in the workplace seems like a matter of prestige. However, their throttle itself is so loud that they rarely are taken out on the roads! They have a lot to show off about, but only while gulping down a lot of company resources like time and money. Surprisingly, they are considered of prime importance because of their explicit speaking tactics. Wait until you ask them to get on a steep hill!

PAY SCALE: High

3. Jeeps

These are the hardworking, younger lots who live on innovations while displaying a brilliant performance on road. Jeeps are the prodigy children of the Buses and know how to climb any mountain to reach their goals. Since they are not as pretty, they are often not credited for the work they do and are conveniently overshadowed. All they need is a pat on the back and the correct driver to steer them. Roads need more of these; unfortunately, people buy a lot of other unimportant cars that are mentioned in the list.

PAY SCALE: Medium

4. Second Hand Budget Cars

These are the ones you will often find broken down on the side of the roads, sometimes causing traffic. Often they have to be dragged by the towing van (read, Team Leaders!) to the garage (again, read KRAs!). Yet, they are often seen on the roads considering their cheap maintenance and easy – to – purchase budget. They provide no mileage with their bad quality engine, can break down anytime and cost your annual CTC highly for their parts!

PAY SCALE: Medium (and much – Favoured too, Surprisingly!)

5. Three-wheeler

These are the prodigy children of Premium sports cars, yet they forget their cheap black-and-yellow paint, & that they are not as important as they consider themselves to be. These are highly active and make more mistakes than the actual work. Three-wheelers simply want to lead – whether they can beat a jeep or not, is a completely irrelevant question for them! This lot of employees are not much dependable – they will either excel or take you down like the Titanic!

PAY SCALE: Medium (and Increasing!)

6. Road-rollers

Remember space occupiers? Yes, these are the ones! They throw their weight around and are plonked at their desks like the President of the United States. They want to be the prodigy child of the Sports cars, but are too slow to catch up. Often called the Parrots, they follow the road as told and repeat the same things as their Supervisors. Far from innovation, Road-rollers can be seen gossiping around.

PAY SCALE: Low to Medium

7. Sedan Cars

High on innovation and low on maintenance, these are the true performers on the road (or workplace), along with jeeps and buses. They are dependable, inspirational, can lead the way and work hard to reach their goals. Sedans makes you want to have them in your life; they set examples and limits, and are often the ones to break the stereotypes. They are easy on the budget but deliver quality and results.

PAY SCALE: Medium (Should be High like the luxury Sports cars!)

8. Two-wheelers

They care for no one at the workplace and are often in their own sweet world! Two wheelers make their way in the traffic and can leave behind even the best in the immediate traffic. However, for the long run, they stand no chance to deliver and are used to cover short distances (or achieve small milestones)

PAY SCALE: Low to Medium (But they generally don’t care!)

What category do you belong to?

Got a category we missed out here? write to us on magic@grandmamaspeaks.com

192 thoughts on “8 Employee Types you will find at your Workplace!”

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